Was talking to a friend on the topic of love and I said..

"I believe in true love but I don't believe in everlasting love" at the moment.

Does that means that I will not be able to love a person whole-heartedly forever?
No... I don't mean that.

What I meant was..

I'm able to love a person whole-heartedly and endlessly only under the correct environment.

There are just too many obstacles to prevent you from loving someone unconditionally forever.

Betrayal, misundestandings, inability to communicate on the same frequency, lack of same common interest, lack of trust, self-centric, inexperienced... so on and so forth.

Does that means I don't truly love my partner when I'm in a relationship?

No.. I'm proud to say that for all my relationships, my love for my partner have always been 100% true.

I always place my partner as a higher priority than myself. I get them things which I don't even bear to buy it for myself. Why?

Simple... I'm happy to see them happy.

I have grown alot and learn alot over the years. I have learn how to be a better boyfriend, I saw how some of my exs fair so much better than me in certain areas and it makes me love them even more.

Reason?

Because during that particular moment, you really felt the love that was emitting from them. I don't know how to explain it in details but trust me, you can feel the love they had for you.

Incidentally, I also think that love is a weird thing.

If one day your partner is no longer beside you, no longer part of your life, the amount of love you have for your partner starts to fade (without you realizing) regardless whether you want it or not.

Yeah, you will still miss them, you do things to hide your sadness, pick up new hobbies to distract yourself from thinking about the past but like the saying goes... "Time heals all wounds... and fades all love".

Knowing this fact, it's even more aching coz you are scare. Scare of what?

Scare of the fact that you know your love for your ex is fading over time..

Part of you try hard to let go and go on with your life, but yet another part of you clings on to it tightly... because you were once so in love with this person.

People comes and goes from your life. When someone you love left, they leave a big hole in your life. The size of this hole greatly depends on how close and how much you once shared your lives together.

Obviously, the closer you were together before, the bigger and deeper this hole is.

You suddenly realize you are alone, with so much time to spare and yet nothing to do.
Some choose to dwell on and on, others start finding things to fill up this hole.. but what does that only means?

That means you are doing things to decrease your love for that person which is commonly known as "moving on".

During this phrase, there will be new people venturing into your life, some stop for awhile and leave, some become friends while there may be others who try to replace the hole that has yet to be filled.

The most cruel part comes when you know you have already moved on...

coz that will means you are now ready to accept someone new in your life and the love you once had so deeply for your ex are nothing but sweet memories...

PS: Someone asked me... "Close your eyes and tell me what do you see."
Unknowningly, I have already captured my answer in one of the pics in my previous entry.